I wish I hadn't stopped making music
I'm not sure anybody knows that one of my favorite colors is camel. which is a pretty silly name for a color
The person I most want to fuck right now is Chappell Roan's drummer
I'm sorry if I'm being problematic
I feel like I'm not allowed to say that I was partly living out of a car and sleeping on my friends' couch ten years ago, with less than $340 to my name after I spent my life savings ($3,500 earned over nine years of working) on a Subaru Forester. But the truth of the matter is that I was partly living out of a car and sleeping on my friends' couch ten years ago, with less than $340 to my name. And nowhere else to go.
Now I am lying in a Queen-size bed that I bought for myself in a house that I bought entirely by myself. Then I was making more money than I ever thought possible and now I am making less money on purpose, because I am trying to do more of something meaningful. And in the center of all of that money, and the lack of it, the having more and the having less, is me, a person, who has a name.
I have been fortunate, and I have also been effortful
I have efforted
Here I am another layer into the spiral
Learning again, not surprising and also epiphanic, the same lesson and also different, deeper: If you aren't able to be yourself with people, no matter how many you surround yourself with, you're still alone
