Glissade

So we find ourselves at this impasse: If I tell you the truth you'll ask why I stayed.



I am scared to start again, because things went so poorly the first time.


I have restarted at least one major thing in my life and so far it's contributing to a level of happiness that I haven't felt in a long time



The reason I am going to the mountain every chance that I get is because every time I ski I feel joy. How many activities is this true for: If I do this, I'll be happy


Today by myself I lapped 10 runs while he and she hucked cliffs in the glades. As for me I went faster, and faster, practiced keeping my skis together through the entirety of each turn. Practicing over and over by myself, for the joy of it, for the chance to do the same under more extreme conditions in the backcountry, because I want to do more of it for the rest of my life, at the top of a mountain

Then we skied down to mid-mountain and ate shared lunches brought from home. Then on to the bottom with a quick detour, I sat on the deck and watched the sun and the mountains come out


Something I am doing more and more and it feels good



Hanna is so happy to have her best friend here for a sleepover. I remember so many of them with a bad taste in my mouth



Listen: Fuck 'em. June you've gotta get back into it