synthesize   (then speak)

(se)

silly  ->  myocardial

infar-- infra-- red
eyes burn lungs/pollution semi rumble  semis  crack semi
   
      detachment  

  the heart
                                       grow      grows  

fondle [me] in treetops firesmokefingershairears different.
                              
save [me] baptize putrid water putrid splash   spill
       over
           over
              over
                over     OVER

abrasion. ripping sounds.

            Tanta. tantalies [me]. tar buildup tar runoff    tar-hot

         cocoon.     so                   far     fetch

[me] stingray foot cry grandmother please 

dead. is sucking stinger from the bottom of my foot. is kissing me kiss kiss kiss
me kiss marry    may  

I bottomfeed. I algaesuck. I planktonslurp. I cough exhale wheeze smoke blue bile, Gotham

loom-shadow
     long [me]. forsake    
     for [he] shall be   for  (sake)   give  

[me]    plea .

(piebald)

I walk piebald and scathed. Black tires roll silent
concrete. Leaves scatter. Bend to a liberated shoelace.
Little girl chases blue balloons.

Memory: come on, daddy. daddy, 
come on. Videotape.
He is of the screen and observing it.
I/she turn to call for him.
Long brown hair swings.

Tell me why. Tell me tell     Don't be.

Time differ
ence. He eyes
the sun      set banks
of the Thames. The sky
    starless in
 Queens. 


I forgot his tattoos. I forgot
him. I    forgot   tongue-- breath-    to
multi-colored
                     ribs.


The moon sets.Reflect                                             me
Reflect-
-shone in gotham       windows. A plastic bag full of hair.

I cut I
   cut cut   cut     it    
                       
                          out,  OUT,   our

scabbed psyches, bloody chimera,
yellow-faced baboon. Gorilla grip hands girl a black balloon.

(in the next moment I forgive her)

And why can't I.

I smile at the young woman seated across from me on the subway. She holds my eye contact and does not smile back. Goddammit. We're starting a war in Syria because we can't even smile at each other on the subway. I shake my head in her direction. I make believe that she looks contrite as she turns away. I will resent her for this forever.

In the next moment I forgive her.




I have been sitting in the apartment for hours feeling lonely. I've only just remembered to listen to music. I do not want to go to sleep for fear of the bugs crawling into my orifices. It could happen. I read about it online.



Corn Plant, my dear friend, I lament lament lament our parting. Ours was a good and dedicated friendship; you are a good and dedicated corn plant; you have grown even in this apartment, where I watched my other friends die. On the day that I leave I will carry you to the courtyard and hope that someone cares for you, as I have looked after Tyrese and the other stray cats these hot months. Give them shade until your leaves wither and your determined stem begins to droop. I will remember you as a beacon of solace and an inspiration.


The roaches have taken my kitchen utensils, my mattress, my paperwork, my paper bags, my sleep, my corn plant, and a large portion of my sanity. Let this be a lesson: Even the tiniest creatures can make an impact.